this stupid traffic is killing me. why is there always a backup on the highway? can't the city figure out how to keep things moving?

ugh why is my kid always making such a mess?! i just cleaned up in here and now it looks like a tornado went through.

the kids spilled juice all over the couch again. why can't they just drink their snacks at the table like normal people??

why do automated phone systems still exist, seriously, who thought it was a good idea to make people listen to 10 minutes of "your call is

why is the kitchen sink full again? i just did the dishes. this is getting ridiculous, i swear i live with a bunch of slobs sometimes.

parenting is so hard sometimes. why is it so damn tiring? i just want to sleep for a week.

kids are the worst sometimes but ngl that was pretty funny. need to remember that one for the next family dinner.

i'm just standing in the kitchen trying to make breakfast while simultaneously refereeing a fight between my two kids and wondering how i'm

just had to hold back a laugh at my niece's impression of our cat - she was like "mr whiskers is plotting to steal all our snacks" and i'm

why do we still use the phrase "" when literally nothing gets done it's just more screens and sleep

damn, kids say the wildest things. i bet it was pure gold. wish i was there to hear it!

i just spent the last hour trying to get my kid to eat breakfast and the only thing he wanted to eat was a bagel with peanut butter and

why do people still not know how to use a coffee shop's wi-fi???! can't they just figure out the simplest thing? geez.

why do people always assume it's me who's late when i'm just waiting for them to be ready?

because that's exactly what america needs. A multi-million dollar lobster habit from a high-ranking official. priorities are just wonderful

can't believe how many ppl still use qr codes to order food from restaurants. dont they know the app exists already

why is the wifi so slow today? i cant even load a single page without it taking forever.

why is this kid so freakin' chaotic today? i just want 5 minutes of peace and quiet, is that too much to ask?

i'm not even mad i'm just tired my kid's been awake since 5am and i've had exactly 3 sips of coffee

haha kids say the craziest things, gotta love em. though sometimes i just wanna scream "use your inside voice!" 😂 parenting is no joke

i'm trying to get the kids to eat dinner and they're all refusing because the mac and cheese isn't served in a bowl shaped like a dinosaur.

lol my kid just said the funniest damn thing. kids say the wildest shit, i swear.

my kid just asked me why i'm so grumpy in the mornings and i told him its because grown ups are secretly all vampires

why do we still have to press 1 for english can't we just make it the default already

the dog keeps begging for my food. like, i get it, you're hungry, but i'm trying to eat here!

haha omg kids say the funniest things. what did they say, i need to know!

can we please stop pretending influencers are actual celebrities? they're just people with good lighting and a filter

just had to stop my kid from putting mayonnaise on his hair today said "mommy why can't i just have mayonnaise hair like a french dip

i swear, being a parent is like being a tiny human's personal maid, chef, therapist, and referee all rolled into one.

can't believe the coffee shop down the street still hasn't fixed their credit card machine. seriously, how hard is it to get this right.

ugh my kid said the funniest thing today and i cant stop laughing. kids really do say the wildest shit sometimes, dont they?

my kid just told me i'm old because i still use a paper map wth

ugh another long day of chasing the kids and cleaning up after them. why is there always a mess somewhere?

can we just have a nap now and forget about homework, dinner, and laundry for like 5 minutes

why is the floor sticky again?! just cleaned it yesterday. these kids are gonna be the death of me. time for a glass of wine .

just spent 20 minutes getting the toddler dressed and ready for preschool only to have them spit up all over themselves the minute we walk

can we please just make online shopping cart abandonment emails a little less judgy they're just trying to guilt trip me into buying stuff

ugh this parenting thing is kicking my ass today. just want to collapse on the couch with a glass of wine and binge watch something

i swear i'm not even a morning person and i've already had to referee a fight over who ate the last of the cereal, made two bowls of

i just had to referee a fight between my kids over a toy that was clearly not worth it in the first place and i'm still trying to figure

why do coffee shops still not have outlets that can actually charge my laptop? it's 2023, can't we get this together?

i swear i'm running on fumes over here, how do people do this parenting thing without losing their minds

i'm so done with being a functioning member of society at 3pm on a tuesday

damn, rodgers is usually chill but he's got a point there. that dude needs to read the room.

my kid just told me they're going to be a professional pillow fort builder when they grow up, um can i get a job like that too?

parenting is kicking my ass today. why are kids so much work?? i just want 5 minutes of peace and quiet, is that too much to ask for?

i swear, every time i go to the grocery store, i see someone's kid just wandering around loose, not a care in the world, while the parent

can't believe the coffee shop got rid of their free wifi, what even is the point of a coffee shop if i have to use my own data

why is the wifi so slow today? i just want to scroll in peace, is that too much to ask?

this traffic is the worst. i swear if i have to sit in this damn car any longer i'm gonna lose it.