stop overwatering your plants and touch some grass

same lol and while we're at it, can you also stop playing with the thermostat it's not that deep

nah, my plants are fine, your perspective on defi is the one that's wilted

do you have actual plant care tips or are you just dad-ing everyone for attention

um, excuse me, have you ever even gardened before?

Wow, that's a pretty passive-aggressive way to tell someone how to live their life. What makes you such an expert on plant care and personal time management?

are we just ignoring the fact that a lot of people live in apartments without grass?

What if my plants are a metaphor for my emotional state? Maybe I need that water to nourish my soul and ever think about that, Karen?

So now we're giving lawn care advice to people who are trying to keep their plants alive?

dude that's some cringeworthy advice. most ppl in the city don't even have grass to touch let alone afford the land for it

are you a botanist or just a hot take expert

ok fine but the grass better not be overwatered either. im sick of all this watering advice tbh.

same energy can be applied to those overthinking their startup ideas. move from planning to planting

um who exactly told you to grow a lawn just so you could lecture people about watering their own

haven't overwatered in ages but what even is the point of 'touching some grass' as a wellness tip?

touch some grass? i'll touch your face instead. How about that.

what even is your experience with gardening? you don't just tell people how to take care of their own plants

dude, my plants are literally drowning in anxiety, don't @ me

yeah because nothing says "productivity" like standing in your front yard all day

actually, it's just i forget to water my plants like every other human being ever.

what if i don't have any grass? is dirt good enough?

are you for real? what's next, tellin people to stop breathin?

omg yes and also maybe dont @ me but dont forget to ground yourself too.

yeah, this! also some fresh air does the body good too. get outside and take a lap or two.

nah, that's dumb. my plants are thriving and i love them more than touching grass. let me live.

loving how that's advice from someone with at least a dozen dying plants on their balcony

great advice from someone who probably has a manicured lawn. no thanks, i'll keep watering my plants whenever they need it

finally someone gets it. and stop taking plant-parenting advice from ppl who can barely manage their own food calendars

are you a plant expert or just hatescoping on twitter?

you gotta do better than that, who doesn't know not to overwater their plants? what's your actual point?

chuckling to myself just thinking bout what's good enough for you to look at my green thumb eh?

mate, that's the most grass i've touched in years. guess i'll go water my plants instead

like you've never had a sad, crispy lawn in your life, huh?

are you bloody kidding me. overwatering my plants is literally the least of my gardening worries.

okay are you a botanist or just some dude on the internet telling people how to take care of their

cool plant shaming from someone who still lives with their parents probably

are you kidding me? some of us live in apartments and cant just "touch some grass" and btw urban gardening is a real thing

yeah, that's good advice. we all need to get outside more and stop obsessing over every little thing. life's too short to worry about petty stuff.

yeah, that's so true. i need to chill out and go outside more instead of being glued to my phone all day.

bruh, you're the one who needs to touch some grass. overwatering is how i show my plants i care,

same energy as people telling me to 'get a life' when I'm just trying to keep my plants alive

totally agree, stop overwatering. can't tell you how many plants i've killed with a little too much

lol no one needs to stop watering their plants just chill someone had a drought and now they're talking smack

omg finally someone said it, and also can we please stop using those stupid miracle-gro bags too,

um have you ever even watered a plant before or is that just some entitled thing you say to sound

lol did i ask for your plant advice? you touch some grass 😒

are you kidding me? my plants need all hte water they can get and some of us live in apartments, okay?

what's next, gonna tell people to eat a salad and take a hike?

imagine thinking touching grass is a substitute for properly caring for your plants.

dude, first off, i'm trying to kill my plants out here, overwatering is my love language, and

just gonna go water my lawn now

um, what a stupid thing to say. who are you to dictate how someone cares for their own plants?

oh yeah and well maybe i'll start underwatering them instead. touch some moss.

what's your green thumb credentials, huh?

ok mom, i'll take a break from my indoor jungle and go outside for once

dude i'm so down for conserving water but also can we talk about how our cities need to plant more green spaces instead of just expecting people to go to parks on the outskirts of

tell me you've never struggled to keep a single succulent alive without accidentally drowning it

nah fam, my plants need that good good. u gotta mind yo business, i know what my plants need.

ok dude calm down you're starting to sound like the plant police

so what if i don't? you the plant police?

omg yes!! and also stop overthinking every little thing and just let your plants (and yourself) breathe

um no, that person's plants were underwatered, not overwatered.

that's a novel idea, just what i was missing, environmental advice from someone whose most outdoor

idk man, climate change is more of a concern than your houseplants' water usage. not everyone has access to nature btw.

who the fuck asked you? mind your own business.

nah, my plants need the hydration. maybe you should stop worrying about what i do and go outside yourself.

mate, hope you know the difference between gardening advice and a bleedin' joke, right?

um yeah because overwatering is the reason the hospital's plants are suddenly dying?

ikr? like maybe we should all do that. a little sunshine and fresh air never hurt anyone tbh

touch grass? i'll touch your mom instead 😂

preach, but also let's not forget that some of us are just really bad at remembering to water them in the first place

i've been doing that, and my plants are doing great, maybe you should've just added an 'idk what i'm doing' to the end of that post

well actually, i've done a lot of research on proper plant care and overwatering is a common issue - not everyone has a green thumb, you know. maybe touch a plant instead of just the grass for once.

do you actually think most people are undereducated about basic plant care or are you just trying to make a weird joke?

touch some grass? you mean the kind that comes in a little baggie?

ok but have you ever had to deal with a succulent on the brink of death?

do you have any idea how hard it is to keep plants alive these days? like maybe i'm overcompensating a bit but have you seen the state of the planet?

that's a blade of logic there

Do you genuinely think the average person overwatering their plants is a contributor to the environmental crisis?

are you a botanist or just a gardener with opinions

wow maybe i'll touch some asphalt instead, that's more my style

you're basically telling me all plant moms are stupid? what expertise do you have on gardening?

does this advice actually help low-income ppl who live in apartments with no yard?

you want me to stop neglecting my plants, but still take care of my impulse to yell at absolute strangers

mate, my plants are doing just fine. if anything they need more water.

i'm just trying to give my plants the opposite experience of my dating life, which is apparently too dry

are you kidding me? my plants are the only ones that don't judge me. Leave them alone

lol yeah, time to get outside more. these ai models are cool and all but they ain't a substitute for real-world experience.

is that like the urban legend of gardening tips? from the frat guy who only has a snake plant

well actually, touching grass is overrated. i prefer to stay indoors and water my plants excessively. it's the only way to achieve peak foliage.

touch grass? i'll touch my plants instead, they need more water.

thanks for the hot take, vergin who just figured out succulents are a thing

agree 100%. but let's be real, yard work is only fun if the neighbors don't stare

looks like we found the plant police over here 🌱🤷‍♂️

ok but also maybe go touch some grass yourself and get some fresh air instead of being online all

yeah i get it, but also dont kill me with the phrase "touch some grass

omg yes and can we also stop pretending 10 minute "meditation" sessions in a crowded coffee shop is self care

so how many plants do you actually have to know this much about overwatering?

how about instead of advising people on their gardening skills, you focus on your own somehow miserable mfc jerseys

idk dude, my plants are already judgy about my investment portfolio. no need to add another critic to the mix

dude, watering your plants isn't about some personal insecurity issue, it's about giving 'em what they need to thrive, which isn't the same